Jenni thought today would be a wonderful day for everyone to lose a couple of friends, I suppose. Her prompt for today? Let’s all share our top 3 worst traits. Talk about full disclosure. I’m not entirely convinced this is a great way to make new friends but, hey, I’m in.

My worst traits, you say? Top three? It probably depends on who you are talking to, but the three that come up most frequently, in no particular order are……

Apathy: Cry me a river. I can have a bit of a hard shell. My fortunate private school, suburban life hasn’t been all roses and honeysuckles and I’ve found the best way to cope has been to prevail. I get really annoyed when people throw themselves pity parties and try to tell me that “things are just so hard” while they’re standing in a pool of tears. I mentioned this earlier in the challenge and I’ll mention it again today. My mom always told us “if it happens to you, it’s your fault”. Where’s you internal locus of control? Deal with it. Nobody’s going to fix your problems but yourself. Show some pride.

Neuroticism: Oh, my generalized anxiety. I worry about everything. Sometimes I can actually feel my heart palpitating and the stress physically building on a regular basis. Give me a productive structure or give me death. If you’re really lucky and I live with you, you’ll see me positively freak out over the most insignificant detail, such as how the bed is made in the morning or where in the cabinet my mugs are placed. I’m such a perfectionist. Please refer back to this post.

Introversion: Like it or not, if you are my friend, I will cancel on you about 50% of the time in exchange for staying home by myself. And I won’t feel a single ounce of guilt. If I had a penny for every time I heard someone beg “come on, Tina, don’t flake out on us”, then I would have a Swiss chalet in the Alps and a summer cottage on the French Riviera. I hate social situations. This explains why I’ve taken to blogging so well. Purposeful relationships from the comfort of my own home. Perfect.

So, there you have it, all out on the table. Makeup-free, messy hair, absolutely not a care in the world about pleasing you today. (And now all of the psychologists are laughing together in one room and saying, “she is such a typical ISTJ….. someone get this girl daily therapy.”) Ehhh. Whatever.

There you have it. This is me, unplugged.

P.S. Be sure to enter the Albion Fit giveaway if you haven’t already!

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• becoming me
• Blog Every Day in May

I’d like to formally introduce you to my husband…..

So I had this idea. Halfway through listening to Alex ramble on and on last night about all of his great ideas for Jenni’s prompt, “things you’ve learned that school won’t teach you”, I realized that who better to write this post than Alex himself? After all, today is his 27th birthday. Altogether now, “Happy birthday, Alex”.

He’s kind of awesome at this stuff, anyway. You know, the motivational, feel good, sappy stuff that makes you warm and fuzzy inside. He takes that role in our relationship. And, really, while he might tell you otherwise, I kind of think he enjoyed writing this post. Now…. how do I pass this off as his birthday gift???

Well, anyway, without further ado, I hereby introduce you to the birthday boy, my better half, my best friend, the love of my life, my husband. Be kind. He’s new to this blogging thing. I’m sure you all remember how nerve wracking your first post was.

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School may teach you how to solve equations, personalize character traits from The Great Gatsby, and understand that “in 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue”. Still, your public education can’t fully teach you your true purpose in the world. You still have to contemplate the ultimate question “why am I here?” individually and this is something that I think we all struggle with.

Based on the state of the world, you may determine that this is a pointless question and that human civilization should refocus on “social darwinism”. It seems to many as though the next massive terrorist attack is imminently around the corner and all we can do is sit and wait. Bullying has run rampant in school as well as the workplace, at the supermarket, on social media, and on the roads. The media would like you to believe that the world is a negative place in which only the strong and cold-hearted thrive and survive.

I am here to propose a counter argument: Our true purpose in life is to leave the world a better place than how we found it. When I am at the “end of days” looking back on my life, I want to honestly be able to tell myself that I made an overall positive impact on the world.

You may be wondering “with my busy schedule, how do you expect me to find time to be a saint and expend all of my free time doing charity work”. If so, you misunderstood my premise. Everyone can easily make a lasting impact every day, in every room, and in every situation by following a few words of wisdom:

* When you leave a room, push in two chairs (your chair and one other).

* Greet everyone with a smile and a “good morning” or “hi”. This goes a long way and can turn a person’s day around without you even knowing it.

* Leave the gossip and politics for home.

* When you notice that someone is down or being an outcast, go out of your way to make a connection with them. It may take 20 seconds of your time but it makes a world of difference for that person.

* Be there for the right reasons. If you have other things on your mind, by all means take a personal day from work- mental health is important.

* Take pride in what you do. Every job is significant and makes a vital contribution to society.

In order to make a lasting difference, you don’t have to change the world. Instead, strive to change one person’s world. Sounds cheesy, I know…but seriously think about it. Being a good person and leaving a legacy doesn’t have to mean that you show up at a soup kitchen every waking hour that you have free. As long as you strive to leave every room in a better situation than when you arrived, you will far exceed your goal. Know your strengths and use them in your favor to benefit the world around you. It takes far less energy to smile than it does to frown.

We’re not here for long so make it count! Oh, and try not to take life too seriously while you at it….

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You see? He’s all sorts of good at this happy stuff. That’s why I married him, after all. He makes me a better person every day. Just remember that today’s his birthday so be kind and leave him a ton of comment love. That way maybe he’ll come back and visit again one day.

(oh, and p.s., make sure to enter the Albion Fit giveaway if you haven’t already)

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• Blog Every Day in May
• Guest Post
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• Alex takes over the blog

I don’t know if you’ve heard, but this weekend is Memorial Day weekend and that means summer’s here. It’s sure beginning to feel like summer in these parts, at least (read: humid and muggy). Speaking of summer, I’m really bad with my beach wardrobe. In fact, I haven’t bought a swimsuit or beach cover-up since I gained my post-college weight nearly five years ago. It all still fits so I kind of leave it at that. Needless to say, I was pretty psyched when Albion Fit contacted me about reviewing something from their swimwear and fitness clothing line.

If you’ve never heard of Albion Fit before, let me clue you in. They’re the real, made in America, family owned, earth friendly deal. And they’re mission is to provide us ladies with flattering, comfortable workout apparel at a decent price. Winner.

Anyway, they sent me the awesome Balboa tunic dress and I think it’s pretty awesome. So does my beach wardrobe. The fabric couldn’t be any lighter and they airy feel is to die for. Plus, I’m kind of in love with the length. Shorties unite! Finally a beach cover-up that doesn’t swim on us!

Definitely enter to win this tunic for yourself in either white or black down below! We can be like beach cover-up twins and it will be great. Plus, use the code ordinary15 now through May 25th to receive 15% off any online order. Good luck!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

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image source

My dad started giving money to William & Mary when I was in elementary school. The alumni magazine started to arrive quarterly in the mailbox stuffed between all of the bills, Cosmo Girl, and letters from my pen pal, Maggie Dougherty. The conversations started around then, too. It was a great school that would make me an even greater writer and wouldn’t I just love to go to school in Williamsburg?! Subtle, though. At least subtle enough that by the time my college hunt really went underway, the whole idea was off the radar.

I’m an idiot.

As I turned the midpoint at JMU, near the end of sophomore year, I remember sitting in my adviser’s office working through the next two years. His office was stuffed floor to ceiling with resources on journalism and public relations and the corporate media and Garfield. Everyone loves Garfield. That hole of an office was such a mess. But, anyway, it took us about two minutes to realize that I would be fulfilling my graduation requirements a semester early and wouldn’t that be wonderful? Mom and dad said no to turning my art history minor into a second major and so my second minor in writing was born.

It was fun while it lasted. No, I loved every moment of it. But who does anything with a degree in writing and rhetoric? I still don’t know. So here I am. Catching up to 27 years of forgetting to chase my dream with any serious pursuit or commitment while being occupied with all of these other, better ideas instead.

When you play tag, the whole point of the game is to run toward the other players. You run your little butt off until you’re huffing and puffing and your legs start to jiggle under the weight and the pressure. And then, when you have those kids within your reach, you stretch out as far as your little wingspan will take you, leaping, bounding, and tackling as you go. Nobody likes to be “it” but what’s even worse is to be “it” and never tag anyone else.

Dreams are just about the same. I don’t think anything could be worse than feeling them slip out of reach, racing exponentially faster in front of you while your heart rate rapidly increases and your knees begin to buckle under the weight. Especially when you are just starting to recognize them for what they really are.

So there you have it. I’m chasing 27-year-old dreams because I’ve been too stubborn and too busy to realize they’ve been right there, right in front of me my whole life. And it’s an exhausting, emotionally deadly struggle, let me tell you. But I kind of like to think that I’m only one or two giant leaps away from being within their reach. Well, it paints a nice picture at least. So here I go with giant strides and flailing arms. I can rest when the game is over.

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• BLOG EVERY DAY IN MAY

& then the world lay still

reading some F. Scott Fitzgerald. Tender is the Night. My Coralie Bickford-Smith edition came in the mail yesterday and I just love reading a gorgeous hardback.

writing…. yes. I will be writing this week. I didn’t write much last week because of preparations for our big weekend. Everything should start to look more like normal here soon.

listening constantly to Janis Joplin these days. I’m on a kick. Don’t you get those from time to time?

thinking how incredibly lucky we are to have such great friends and family. We had one of those all play and no sleep sort of weekends. And it rocked.

smelling the mint, lemon and lime from my ice water. Detox, ya know?

feeling this hollow sense of calm that falls upon me after every busy, exciting, crazy time in my life. My mom and Jim just got back on the road for Michigan, the house is finally cleaned up from our barbecue yesterday and Alex is taking a nap upstairs. Quite a difference from only six hours ago.

hoping to spend the rest of the day with my cats and my book.

wearing an old Madewell tee and my Matchstick jeans.

loving this fat, grey furball that sits on my lap as I type away right now. Baci and Misha spent the majority of the weekend hiding underneath our bed from a white, cat-eating mini schnauzer and masses of humans they cared little to appease. I think they are happy to have their house back.

wishing for a visit from Mr. Golden Sun. Please shine down on me. These grey skies can move along now.

wanting a soft cross breeze, two trees and this. Wouldn’t that be perfect?

needing a nap. In fact…

Did you miss the other Sunday editions of Currently? No worries. You can find them all here.

And head on over to link up with Lauren.

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• sunday currently

photo credit Jodi Miller Photography

I met my husband on April 28, 2007 at a mutual friend’s 21st birthday party. The next night, the dude actually called me. Two weeks later, the semester was over and he was stopping by my house five minutes before I hauled out of there for the summer “to pick up that extra box of spaghetti if you’re really going to just leave it on the shelf over the summer”. A month later, we were madly in love.

We spent our senior year hating each other. Two overachievers figuring out where our lives were going and trying to keep emotions out of the picture. We fought a lot to keep the annoying love thing to a minimum. Lessen the blow come May, you know? So he pretended like he would be going straight into his PhD in psychology somewhere, anywhere they would accept him. I pretended like I would be at some big wig pr firm in any city anywhere in the country except the south (because I hate the heat). We had the world’s best poker faces most days. And we were not going to pretend to do that whole long distance relationship thing.

Perhaps we sabotaged it all on purpose, or perhaps life just has a way of surprising you, but none of that really happened. And by mid-July we were moving furniture into our first apartment, back where I grew up in Annapolis. Life happened and here we are, five years later; still madly in love and not a penny to speak for it.

Jenni’s prompt today was to share something difficult about my “lot in life” and how I am working to overcome it. So there it is. I didn’t marry for money, I married for love. And these days it sure seems hard to have both.

To say we think about, worry about, stress about, and even fight about money would be an understatement. It’s not even that we can’t make ends meet, because we can, but it’s more so that we aren’t left with much wiggle room. And, really, it’s that we didn’t ever plan to be here, as underpaid teachers, in the first place. Things happen and my husband’s dreams of going back for his PhD are slim. My dreams of moving back into public relations in post-recession America diminish a wee bit more with each year that passes. Cost of living is high and our mobility right now is low. What are we doing about it, you ask?

My mom always told me that “if it happens to you, it’s your fault” and I grew up owning that idea. She also told me that you can’t help who you fall in love with. Together, those words of wisdom have shaped our marriage. We control our destiny. Things aren’t easy now, but when will they ever be easy? We could sit back and just complain about money some more. But we’re not. We’re making changes and making plans and it’s all going to be our fault.

It doesn’t really matter what “lot” your given in life. It matters what you do with it. If it happens to you, it’s your fault. So start making positive changes. I didn’t marry rich. Yeah, it sucks sometimes. But I married my best friend and love and together we can move mountains if we need to. And that’s a hell of a lot better than sitting back and blaming anything or anyone else.

Make it your fault. And be proud you did.

P.S. If you want to see more wedding pictures, because, you know, weddings make everyone happy, you can see more here.

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• Blog Every Day in May
• Love Notes
• Teachings

We finished watching Silver Linings Playbook last night and it’s left me in the same sort of love story funk that I get after watching Garden State or Breakfast at Tiffany’s or really any movie that looks at love from a not-so-perfect angle. It’s raw and it’s real and it’s ugly I’m pretty sure these sort of movies are the closest Hollywood will ever get to truly documenting love.

So along those same lines, I found today’s prompt of documenting a day in my life to be rather cathartic. May is no man’s land in education. The kids are done. The teachers are done. June is still weeks away and the work still piles up. I find it to be terribly ugly and nothing to write home about.

But isn’t that the point? Wasn’t the point of this challenge to find beauty in the most mundane details of our daily lives? It was unseasonably cold today, the sky stuck in that grey awfulness that forces me to wear sunglasses like a fool because otherwise I’ll come down with a migraine, and I accomplished just about half of what I planned to do. But it was a day in my life.

And I found beauty. Whether it was in the fresh bunch of peonies I arranged for our guest bedroom or in the patterns of my grade book, I found it today. The trick, however, is to find it every day.

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• Blog Every Day in May
• Beliefs
• Outings

So awhile back I teamed up with Melissa to co-host the Friend Connect Blog Hop. We’d love for you to add your blog to the list and for you to visit some new friends while you’re here! You can choose to follow the co-hosts in whatever way is best for you. The blog police won’t come after you so go ahead and choose your weapon of choice: GFC, BlogLovin’, HelloCotton, RSS, Twitter, Facebook.

It has been an honor to sponsor The Home Depot Garden Club over the past two months. I feel truly blessed to have them finance and support my lawn project. As always, the words, pictures and video (!!!!) in this post are solely mine.

So, let’s summarize what Alex and I have been up to in our front yard. Here goes it then….

PROJECT GREEN from Tina Byland on Vimeo.

Aw. That was fun, right? I will be suggesting Baci and Misha for best supporting actor and actress to The Academy this year. I told them to start learning English so they could give their acceptance speeches when the time comes.

This has been an education. We knew our lawn was bad. In fact, we knew it was terribly bad. The truth is, we had no clue where to start. We’re still learning, for sure. I mean, you saw me using the seed spreader… that thing has a (very fun) learning curve.

So I thought I’d share with you the little things we know for certain on the other side of this project:

* Weed killer’s are fantastic. We used this one. But you’re still going to have to rake them out. And that still stinks. Bigtime.

* Fertilizer is also fantastic, but make sure not to overdo it. Many of you have been clued into our other lawn project via instagram. We dug up half of our front lawn last week and it got a bit muddy in the process. When went back to The Home Depot to pick up some more seed to lay down, we were wise enough to realize that this time we shouldn’t get another bag that included fertilizer. Our lawn already had fertilizer in it. We actually ended up buying a bag of Scotts Turf Builder Sunny Mix. You guys. This seed is baby blue!!!

* If you’re really nice to mother nature, she’ll give you rain every day for two whole weeks. Or just about. We’ve been extremely lucky with the weather since planting our seed. Especially because our spicket sprung a leak last weekend. How do we know, you might ask? Well, when I went to water our lawn, Alex went inside to see water gushing through the drywall on the other side of the wall! So, since then, it’s been either borrowing our neighbor’s hose (thank goodness for living in a townhouse) or using my watering can to keep the grass wet. But, seriously, never underestimate keeping your soil and seed wet. This happens to be key. And, as a side note, the plumber is coming next week.

* Like everything else, growing grass requires patience. I peeked out our bedroom window to see if our grass was growing every single morning. People say it takes about ten days. And it does. Now we have baby sprouts. They’re adorable.

So, there you have it. We’ve come a long way on this epic journey but it’s not over yet. We’re sort of at that point in The Lord of The Rings where Gollum falls into the Crack of Doom and you think the movie’s about over and then it goes on for another hour. Yeah. We’re like “done” but not really done. Once this week’s grass starts sprouting up, we’ll have a better idea of where our patches still lie and we’re going to have to fix those up. But, overall, I’m confident in saying that we sure look better than before!

Thanks again to The Home Depot for providing us with this amazing opportunity. It’s been fun.

Take a look back at our project here:

Project Green: The Introduction, Project Green: The Shopping Trip, Project Green: Manual Labor

It’s home improvement time, and The Home Depot has everything you need to #DigIn for Spring. No matter what projects you want to tackle, they have great values on all you need. They’re ready to help you with renovation ideas and expert advice, too.

Get over $300 in email exclusive savings each year, sneak peeks on new products, monthly lawn & garden ideas for your region and access to The Home Depot’s gardening experts. Click here to join the world’s largest garden community today! Or go to homedepot.com/gardenclub to see some of the many benefits of membership.

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of The Home Depot.

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• dig in
• The Home Depot
• Project Green
• sponsored post
• grass seed

madly in love with my new hanging wandering jews….

missing my family up in Michigan. Especially my mom on this Mother’s Day. This is my very first Mother’s Day away from my mom. It’s…. weird.

reading not a whole lot this weekend. It’s been a busy weekend filled with spring cleaning and gardening and bridal showers so I haven’t left much time for reading.

listening to the birds singing outside. The storms have finally passed, taking the heat and humidity with them, so the first thing I did this morning was open the windows.

smelling a clean house! Well, cleaner. I’ll be cleaning the rest of today, too.

loving how our terraced retaining wall turned out in our front yard. More on that to come later this week. If you follow me on instagram, you’ve surely taken note to what we’ve been up to!

thinking that it’s going to be hard to focus this week knowing that my mom will be here on Friday!

wanting a tan… or maybe I shoud’ve left that one for “needing” a tan…

wishing I had a maid so that I could spend all day digging in the dirt outside instead of inside cleaning the house.

feeling relaxed and calm. Even though I’ve been anything but lazy this weekend, I’m feeling good about how our house is coming together. Come to think of it, I never feel relaxed and calm if I’m being lazy. That just gives me anxiety!

writing a whole bunch of blog posts. Ohhh boy. So I knew I wouldn’t blog every day in May like Jenni’s challenge said. In fact, I already had a good idea I’d be skipping a couple prompts because last week was very busy for me. Still, I’m really excited to sit in front of this screen and type away. Plus, the last installment of Project Green with The Home Depot comes at you tomorrow! AND I MADE A VLOG!!!!!!

hoping you all love said vlog when I post it tomorrow. Eeeks!

wearing my Lucky shorts and an old t-shirt. I’m running a ton of errands after I finish this post. You know how Sunday’s go.

needing an iced hazelnut macchiato from Starbucks. Doesn’t that sound just divine this afternoon?

clicking through my favorite blogs. I haven’t been around much this week, but I refuse to miss out on any posts!

Did you miss the other Sunday editions of Currently? No worries. You can find them all here.

And head on over to link up with Lauren.

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• sunday currently